"I am stronger than depression and braver than loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me".
-Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love)

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Loving Life

I know I have been a little MIA for the last few months, it was not unintentional.  I made the decision in June to simply enjoy my summer, a season that I practically live for.  Sure, I enjoy spring & fall (we aren't even going to mention winter...) but in the summer my numbers actually improve, I am scientifically proven to be happier and healthier in the summer.  If the States wasn't a political nightmare I would seriously consider moving to California.

Even though I made the decision to put the reality of needing another transplant on the back-burner for a few months, I have done a lot of reflecting and planning for the future.  I have made some big life changes in order to set myself up for the next 2+ years of my life.  I have faced the inevitable that I am probably going to end up on dialysis at some point before this transplant.  The odds of finding a match and not impossible, but they are tricky.  I have made the decision that when the time comes I will do hemodialysis where I go into the clinic to have it done a few times a week, rather than trying to do it at home.  I like the idea of knowing that on those days that's just what I'm doing - I go in, do my thing and then leave.  I don't want to turn my home into a place where I have to go back to do dialysis.  I have also made the decision to do a fistula (which gives me the fucking heebie-jeebies, but the alternative tubing comes with the risk of infection and limits my activity options more.  A fistula is the lesser of two extremely shitty options).  So, like I said, I have done a lot of reflecting.  It doesn't make it any easier, but once I get my head around something, I can get through the physical act of doing it.

I do not have any new leads on finding a match.  I have had so many amazing individuals come forward and start the testing process, but as previously mentioned, there are 2% of the antibodies that I won't reject - finding the right match is going to take awhile.  So, if you have been considering donating, please contact the team at LHSC - who knows, you might be my 2%!    

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